Honestly, it’s hard to get too excited about an episode that was so obviously filler and in which so little happened.

I mean, what does it say when Kiefer Sutherland headbutting a fashion designer on the streets of Manhattan in defense (kinda sorta) of Brooke Shields is almost more interesting than the Monday episode (for the definitive story on this, see Point / Counterpoint)? Especially when there are only three hours left in this day and we still have no idea what the frak is going on.

I guess that’s why I never really got around to a separate blog post on it this week and decided to wait for the weekly blog carnival, which I am always happy to host.

Basically, this is what happened this week:

Tony and Red Not forced the Token Muslim guy to pretend he’s a jihadist so they could blame their bad behavior on “those people.” Thing is, this guy was basically the least enthusiastic jihadist EVAR. Seriously, folks, if anyone in the intelligence (or intelligent) community actually believed this video, that this man who had nothing on his record and just got a bunch of money wired to him minutes before the video was shot (ahem, Chloe had that figured out before Jack even got to the guy’s house, for goodness sakes!) and was SO unenthusiastic about his jihad against the bad Americans, they need a vacation. Now. He couldn’t even convince his brother.

Olivia turned from hard-nosed Bitch to whiny little beyotch after nothing more than a car bomb. And, by the way, the car bomb was a little obvious, guys. Adam from The Jack Sack publicly called it before it happened and on 24, whenever someone is left alone in a car for “just a minute” while the other person goes about 200 yards away to “sign him out,”  you can pretty well bet the car’s going to blow up. And Olivia, SHUT UP! Stop whining girl, you got what you wanted. And it’s a pretty good bet you’ll be caught, even if this was independent of your shenanigans, so I hope you enjoy sullying your mother’s good name. (Kudos to Sprague Grayden, by the way, who is obviously a good actress, being able to play such an unlikeable character after being such a likeable character on Jericho!)

The first husband came home to the White House, the best villain in quite some time bit the dust, Jack apologized to Chloe for not telling her he had mad cow (frankly, Mary Lynn and Kiefer both did an excellent job on that scene) and at the liveblog we said “Mooooo” a lot.

And before Jonas went “boom,” he was renamed Robert Tippet and learned he would have to live next door to Steve Martin doing a mobster impression for the rest of his life. That’s when he put out the contract on his own life.

The main question left, besides WTF is wrong with Tony?, is who the last mole is. The fanbase is rooting for Janis Gold. Don’t disappoint us, Howard.

OK, so to the carnival:

Steve gives us his usually detailed recap, Season 7 – 24 – 4 am to 5 am, posted at Magic Lamp. It’s full of Web 2.0 jokes and made me giggle more than once.

Colin Timberlake gave us Underappreciated Actors: Michael Massee, posted at colintimberlake.com. Anyone who could plot to kidnap Jack’s wife, even at the bidding of Victor Drazen, has a titanium-coated pair.

King Tom wrote Of Patsies, Overachieving Hitmen and a Wasted Supervillain, posted at King Tom’s Kingdom, bemoaning the lack of action this season and the loss of a great Jonas-in-witness protection spinoff, which would have been 24‘s first spinoff in seven seasons.

And Adam gave us multiple posts to peruse at The Jack Sack, including his 4 a.m. to  a.m. Quick Review and his Star Trek Movie Review – love the art on that. You also have to check out his co-produced (with the folks at AlmeidaisGod[dot]com) – “Almeida” music video.

That concludes this edition of the Carnival of Bauer!!!. Submit your blog article to the next edition of Carnival of Bauer!!! using our carnival submission form. Past posts and future hosts can be found on our blog carnival index page.

Want to host a future edition of the carnival? Say so in the comments and mention your favorite Jack Bauer kill.
Link to B4B’s Point/Counter

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The big debate Monday night on Blogs4Bauer’s liveblog of Hour 14 was the status of moles.

Right now, it seems as if there are so many moles in the White House, the Rose Garden should collapse in on itself.

Let’s look at the candidates, shall we?

Olivia Taylor

Pro: The first daughter looks awfully good in the Mole Olympics. She’s sneaky, duplicitous and not afraid to wallow in the mud. She played dirty tricks during mommy’s campaign for the presidency, which is what caused them to have a falling out. Now, she’s totally on the dark side, being back in her mom’s good graces. Nearly getting killed by a crazy African dictator will do that for a relationship. She’s totally trying to get Ethan fired and there’s no doubt that she lined up that TV guy to lie for her about his sources to cover her ass. Did you see that smirk when Ethan came up to her after being confronted about that guy being killed in the hospital? She’s the best manipulative beyotch this show has had since Sherri Palmer.

Con: Whatever Sherri Palmer did, she never knowingly betrayed the nation to a crazed dictator. The more you compare Olivia Taylor to Sherri Palmer, the less likely it seems she’s the mole. Plus, she’s SO obvious. They’ve practically bashed us over the head with clues that she’s the mole, so she probably isn’t.

Ethan Kanin

Pro: The money was on him from Hour 1 (I almost said Day 1, but on 24, that doesn’t really work). He always has these sneaky looks on his face. He advocated letting Jack torture. He let Jack go in to the hospital room (did he know that someone was going in there to kill the witness and Jack would get framed for it? Hmm?). The camera’s always lingering on him, too. He is totally all shifty-eyed.

Con: He’s perhaps the only one more obvious to be the mole than Olivia Taylor. And he advocated letting Jack torture someone!

Janis Gold

Pro: Honestly, she hadn’t even occurred to me until Monday as we were watching. She’s so suspicious of everyone, though, and is so quick to rat everyone else out. She totally HAS to know everything that’s going on and can’t stand to be on the outside. She’s the go-to girl when it comes to ‘puters in the office. And she ratted out Chloe! Plus, the guys who absolutely hate her because she’s played by a known liberal will forever love Howard Gordon & Co. if she turns out to be the mole.

Con: She ratted out Chloe, thereby chancing that she’d be exposed. And she’s such an easy target, as a good portion of the show’s fanbase hates her simply b/c she’s played by Janene Garafolo; would they go the easy route?

Tony Almeida

Pro: Where was Tony the last couple hours? And making him the bad guy would totally give viewers whiplash.

Con: Um, he’s TONY. They just brought him back from the dead. They wouldn’t, couldn’t, shouldn’t do that to Adam’s and Rickey’s fragile emotions.

President Allison Taylor

Pro: OK, I know I’m reaching here, but what would 24 be without wholly preposterous plots? After all, Season 5 ended with the total gut-check that the President was in on it all from the beginning! They’ve done it before and they can do it again.

Con: Really? Her? Don’t think so.

There is no other mole

Pro: Haven’t we had enough already this season?

Con: Come on, get real.

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Just a reminder: I’ll be liveblogging 24 with my Blogs4Bauer buddies tomorrow night. Be there or be a rhombus.

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Head on over to Blogs4Bauer for tonight’s liveblog. I’m there now. I’ll recap the first four hours all together after that.

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OK, so the liveblog over at B4B was a bit wacky, shockingly, but I have this to say:

Jack is back.

He’s totally shocked at Tony’s betrayal of the people who have no subpoenaed him and are trying him for crimes against humanity.

Wait, what?

OK. Lemme ponder all this and get back to you tomorrow. I’ll be liveblogging again at B4B tomorrow night for the second two hours of the season premiere.

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Join us over at Blogs4Bauer for tonight’s liveblog!

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